Wednesday, August 27, 2014

A sadness...





"…if a sadness rises in front of you, larger than any you have ever seen; if an anxiety, like light and cloud-shadows, moves over your hands and everything you do. You must realize that something is happening to you, that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in the palm of its hand and will not let you fall." 
-- Rainer Maria Rilke

Monday, August 25, 2014

End of summer.

It's a crazy time of year, kind of like the week before Christmas. It's go-go-go. Squeeze in the last-minute visits. Squeeze in trips to the beach. Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. It seems like so many people I want to spend time with are all available this week. So I've cancelled some other things and am trying to accommodate it.

Trying to go with the flow. That's something that us anxious folks aren't too good with. We love to control it all, and we detest that inner angst that comes with the shift in plans or change in the way things work. It's a constant battle to try to let go. First you have to see the value in loosening your grip, then you have to tell yourself "It's okay, things will work out." Over and over. Rinse and repeat.

Trying not to get overwhelmed when life gets busy is tough. It's also important to know what things you can delay or reschedule. Make room. Breathe. Expand. Rinse and repeat.

Hope the rest of your summer is enjoyable and relaxing, not all busy and overwhelming. I keep trying to tell myself that summer doesn't end labor day weekend. I usually loooove fall but this summer was so great and enjoyable (largely because of the mild weather here at the Jersey Shore) that I'm hanging on tightly. Nice day? Get outside. Beach visit? Must go in water. I have to ease up on the pressure, even the kind I induce on myself.

Summer doesn't end when Labor Day comes. There are still friends to see and gorgeous days ahead. I think for me, I just have to remember that. Over and over again.

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Healing music: Mary Lambert

I've been listening to Mary Lambert for a while, but her new song is even more amazing. She just keeps getting better with intimate, honest lyrics and a great sound.

Love this song...great mental health message about being open about our issues.

Two videos--first has lyrics the other is the official.






"Secrets"

I've got bi-polar disorder
My shit's not in order
I'm overweight
I'm always late
I've got too many things to say
I rock mom jeans, cat earrings
Extrapolate my feelings
My family is dysfunctional
But we have a good time killing each other

[Pre-Chorus:]
They tell us from the time we're young
To hide the things that we don't like about ourselves
Inside ourselves
I know I'm not the only one who spent so long attempting to be someone else
Well I'm over it

[Chorus:]
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are)
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are) So-o-o-o-o what
So what
So what
So what

I can't think straight, I'm so gay
Sometimes I cry a whole day
I care a lot, use an analog clock
And never know when to stop
And I'm passive, aggressive
I'm scared of the dark and the dentist
I love my butt and won't shut up
And I never really grew up

[Pre-Chorus]

They tell us from the time we're young
To hide the things that we don't like about ourselves
Inside ourselves
I know I'm not the only one who spent so long attempting to be someone else
Well I'm over it

[Chorus:]
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are)
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are)
So what
So what
So what
So what
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are)
I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are (secrets are)
So what
So what
So what
So what

(I don't care if the world knows what my secrets are)
So what
So what
So what
So what